Saturday, January 16, 2016


On nights like last night or many others, nothing happens special except for the triggers which can set me off like a Frank Slide avalanche of loss.
To combat this mood what I do is to go into my old Mr. Fix It/Team Hope Mode but to no avail, as I hear Joyce say; “Don’t U Dare Use That Team Hope Voice on Me Richard!”
I do not drink, or do drugs and sex ha! Being touched by someone again, well if I maybe just had someone to hold me for an hour, a night, and a day maybe that would help, maybe not?
As I still would be left with this darkness, silence and this frackin aching hopeless loss!
JESUS “Please Help ME!” (Do not quote me back Him, as I know He is here as He is my roommate!)
They took my first little girl but I fought hard and made a commitment that no matter what crap I would have to go through, I would see her and I do see her.
My second little girl who was “Parentally Abducted”, for just IMO shits and giggles, well; I was so angry that I with GOD’s help, moved heaven & earth to bring her back home.
Still after this I was full of rage about it all, so I worked with 407 other Missing Children, whom I was able to bring back to their homes as well.
Also to let U all know and especially the people that considered me; the nervous, emotional, flakey, over caring Richard is in reality “No Dam Flake, eh? As they only brought out my Rage!
In GOD’s Name I forgive you but do you get it now you losers????
I fought hard to protect Joyce and the kids, with some success and I always gave Joyce my all!  Yet now I'm sad and tired, after all I have tried for 21- 28 years, though it seems now like ninety. Now, I am only left with one more round in my chamber and I ask U GOD, is it for others, or me?
Because I got to know Father GOD as You are far too keen on the where and how and not so hot on the why? Yet I still have these lonely nights and I am once again left this darkness, silence and this frackin aching hopeless loss!
With Love and posted by,
Sir Richard…
P.S. One more thing, for as The Martian said; “the only sort of decent Disco Tune is”:

No comments: