Friday, April 22, 2016


Have you ever seen the aftermath of a suicide?
Well I have from when I was 12, where I had to bind up the wrists of an adult with dish towels, to the suicide of a young boy that we all took to bullying as a daily norm and his splatter on the garage wall from a shot gun stayed there for years.
To a young woman who dove off the barracks building in the Armed Forces one night landing on her head right in front of me and which still haunts me to this day!
At work, one woman dove off a building next door but my brain could not comprehend what was falling, so I counted the floors she past each one. Only to figure what was happening upon that persons landing.
To coworkers or friends, even a Doctor who one day seemed just fine and after the weekend I came back to work or see them to find out that they were dead. You wonder if there was more that you could have done, or why you did not do something, anything!

The one Lady whom was the dearest Lady in all of my life, came to my house one night because I was her “Best Friend”.  I must have given off an air of safety, for she even brought 2 of her kids.
The third was at relatives home and my Lady was driven to my home by a sister in-law and a sister.
What was happening was that her husband was threatening her and the rest of his family with a possible murder and or I thought suicide.
Happily they were not around when he finally cried out with his last violent solution.
Then killed himself but I saved the rest though as he rose to Saint Hood through the years for some reason. The more I tried to save my Lady the harder and harder it became, until she too past due to illness. It now sort of seems to me, that her death was just meant to be and I only just postponed the inevitable. Then again, she did have a life and was “LOVED” by me.

During the reign of Saddam Hussein he used to pay $50,000 U.S. to any Palestinian who would martyr himself by blowing himself up in Israel. Palestinian parents usually had up to 6 kids and no prospects of financial improvement. What was one son or daughter? After all they would be martyred and venerated and financially things would improve thanks to Saddam.  
One day while I was at home and watching the TV News, they were filming at a restaurant in Tel Aviv.
What happened was a 20-year-old Palestinian lad entered the restaurant and detonated a vest wired with C4 explosives. The shock wave knocked many flat, blew out windows every which way.
The smoke so thick that it looked like one was in murky water but as it cleared.
Inside a film crew found a nightmare with bloody parts of people everywhere.
You could even tell where the Palestinian lad was standing when his vest blew.
It was like a perfect circle of death for there was almost nothing left of the people closest to him. For the people closest to this circle were blown to pieces and I was surprised I could see all of this?
The closer they were to the bomber, the more horrific the effect!

This is the same with every suicide that I have ever come across, every single one!
Suicide is really just an act of terror perpetrated against everyone who's ever known you, everyone who's ever loved you and everyone whom in the future you would have loved.
The people closest to you, the ones who cherish you, are the ones who suffer the most pain. They are most damaged from your suicide bomb circle of death, which you detonated through or by, whatever means. I need not go into these ways, as the means are usually the end.
For since 12 years old I have always asked myself, why would a person do that?
Why would you do that to people who love you? People say that they I had no choice and or it was a cry for help but you cannot help someone who is already dead.
I know as I did CPR on my Lady over and over frantically and being that I am not JESUS or an Apostle, I failed just as the EMT’s.
But now with regards to suicide, I don’t believe that there is “NO CHOICE”.  For in my grief I too considered committing my own suicide very, very seriously!
Then I found that there's always a choice!
For this is why I wrote this; “AS SUICIDE HAS TO BE TALKED ABOUT – & NOW!”
With All my Lovin
Written and photo by Sir Richard…

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